Potato Jokes That Are Totes Funny To Death

I love potato jokes. What about you? If not, then you need to join this hilarious comedy act!

These potato jokes will leave you laughing out loud and perhaps even crying with laughter. The best part about these jokes is that they will never die because potatoes can’t die, because they’re vegetables! Let’s starch laughing!

Get ready for your weekend overload of fries. Weekend jokes are next on your family bonding list.

Funny Potato Jokes

  • What are the signs that a potato is in a bad mood?
    • It’s a “crabby” spud!
  • When a potato is afraid to jump in the water, what do you call it?
    • A “commentater”!
  • The potato went to the doctor for what reason?
    • Because it was a little “mashed” up!
  • Can you tell me what a potato’s favorite TV show is?
    • “Starch Trek”!
  • What do you call a potato who can solve mysteries?
    • A “detectater”!
  • What is the best way to make a potato laugh?
    • You mash it up with funny jokes!
  • What’s a potato’s favorite horror film?
    • The Silence of the Yams.
  • When you cross a tater with a race car, what do you get?
    • Crashed potato.
  • What is a spinning potato called?
    • A rotate-o.
What is a spinning potato called A rotate o.
  • Which disease is the most deadly to potatoes?
    • Tuber-culosis.
  • What’s the best way to tell if a potato is in a bad mood?
    • When they’re acting salty.
  • What do you call a monkey who sells chips?
    • A Chipmunk.
  • How did I win the potato-hiding contest?
    • My carbo-hide rate was so good.
How did I win the potato hiding contest My carbo hide rate was so good.
  • Fake potatoes are called what?
    • An imi-tater.
  • Potatoes love horror movies, what’s their favorite?
    • The Silence of the Yams.
  • When you have a yam with a broom, what do you call it?
    • Sweep Potato.
When you have a yam with a broom what do you call it Sweep Potato.
  • Can you tell me what a stolen yam is called?
    • Hot Potato.
  • What do you call a lazy potato?
    • Couch Potato.
What do you call a lazy potato Couch Potato.
  • When you combine an elephant and a bunch of potatoes, what do you get?
    • Mashed potatoes.
  • Which song does a potato like to dance to at a Halloween party?
    • The ‘Monster Mash’.
  • Which potato is the most powerful?
    • Darth Tater.
  • Does a potato have a favorite author?
    • Edgar Allen Poe-tato.
Does a potato have a favorite author Edgar Allen Poe tato.
  • On a sunny morning, what does a potato say?
    • What a mashing day!
  • What do you call a first aid vehicle made from potatoes?
    • Yambulance.
  • The life philosophy of a potato?
    • I think, therefore I yam.
  • How did the burger propose to the fry?
    • With an onion ring.
  • What is the best way to tell if a potato is in a bad mood?
    • When they’re acting salty.
What is the best way to tell if a potato is in a bad mood When theyre acting salty.
  • Do you know what you call a lethargic baby kangaroo?
    • A pouch potato.
  • What makes potatoes such good detectives?
    • Because they always keep their eyes peeled.
  • How do you describe potatoes with right angles?
    • Square roots.
  • What caused the potato salad to blush?
    • Because it saw the salad dressing.
  • What made the potato go to a psychiatric hospital?
    • It was starch raving mad.
  • What do you say to an angry baked potato?
    • Anything you like, just butter it up.
  • What is a spud’s least favorite dance?
    • The mashed potato.
What is a spuds least favorite dance The mashed potato.
  • To carry potatoes, what do you use?
    • A tater tote.
  • What do you call a skateboarding potato who is careful with money?
    • A Chipskate.
  • Why wouldn’t you give a zombie mashed potatoes?
    • Because they’re already a little grave-y.

Do you want to see more jokes? We get it. Here you’ll find jokes about your favorite animals from chicken jokes, cow jokes to fish jokes and dog jokes

Potato One-Liners & Stories

  • I yam always very happy…
    • to eat sweet potatoes.
I yam always very happy… to eat sweet potatoes.
  • All potato puns are…
    • pomme de terrible.
  • Potatoes are my favorite food.
    • They seem very a-peeling to me.
Potatoes are my favorite food. They seem very a peeling to me.
  • Are you looking for potato puns?
    • You can always count on me to chip in.
  • In a field, two Amish women are digging potatoes.
    • Turning to the other, the first holds up two large potatoes and says, “These potatoes remind me of Jacob”.
    • The second responds, “They’re that big?”
    • No”, the first person responds. “They’re so dirty.”
  • One day, a guy enters a store to ask if they sell Potato Clocks.
    • “Sorry sir, we don’t.” says the assistant. Battery clocks, electrical clocks, and wind-up clocks are available. In fact, I’ve never heard of a potato clock.”
    • The man says… “Neither have I, but my wife suggested I get a potato clock because I start a new job tomorrow at nine.”
  • I offered them a ride when I saw some crisps walking down the street.
    • “No thanks”, they replied, “we’re Walkers”.

Looking for more? We got you! Have with these food jokes, fruit jokes and burger jokes.

The Potato Humor Quiz:

Author’s Note

Potato jokes are the best kind of joke. They’re so funny and you can’t help but laugh because potatoes are awesome! There’s nothing quite like a good potato joke unless it’s a bad potato joke. If you want to get out of the doldrums and have some fun with your coworkers, try these funny jokes that will make everyone at work LOL (laugh out loud). 

If you want more puns, visit our entire collection of Funny Jokes Today.

Do you want to know more about potatoes? Here are some fun facts that everyone can enjoy.

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About the author

Megha Sharma

Megha is the heart of funnyjokestoday.com - When waking up in the morning, her first thought always is how to create a smile on someone's face before breakfast. Her passion are jokes for the youngest and about animals.

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