Best Fruit Jokes That Will Quench Your Thirst for Laughter

Fruit jokes are a great way to lighten the mood and get your friends laughing. 

The classic fruit joke is a source of humor that has endured since ancient times. We usually share them with friends and family during lunch or dinner, but sometimes it is nice to just sit back and enjoy the fruit-based comedy all by yourself. 

These punny jokes are funny, creative, and perfect for any occasion! You don’t have to be an expert comedian or comic genius in order to tell these jokes – all you need is a good sense of humor (and some fruit).

Fruit Jokes for All Ages

  • What’s a fruit’s go-to novel?
    • “The Grapes of Wrath”
  • Why did the fig end up in court?
    • Because it had been “fig”-hting for justice, and it wasn’t about to let injustice become a “fruit”-ful problem!
  • What do you call a fruit that’s a martial arts master?
    • A “chop” – they’ve got a knack for slicing and dicing their way to fruity success!
  • When you mix a pineapple with a berry, what do you get?
    • A fine-apple! It’s the fruit version of a top-tier blend.
  • What’s the name for a fruit that’s a bit rough around the edges?
    • A little “berry” – they might be prickly on the outside, but they’re sweet on the inside!
  • Why did the fruit decide to attend the party?
    • Because it wanted to get “kiwi” with it and show off its smooth moves on the dance floor!
  • When does an apple become grumpy?
    • When it’s a crab apple!
  • Can you tell me what King Kong’s favorite food is?
    • Ape-ricots! 
  • When two bananas meet, what do they do?
    • A banana shake! 
  • Which school subject yields the most fruit?
    • History – because it is full of dates.
  • What happens if you sit on a grape?
    • It gives a little wine! 
  • Which fruits are twins’ favorites?
    • Pears!
  • Have you heard the joke about the peach?
    • It’s pit-iful! 
  • What kind of fruit will fix your sink?
    • A PLUM-ber.
  • Which fruit is the most appealing to trees?
    • Pine-apple. 
  • Which fruit does a scarecrow like best?
    • Straw-berries.
  • What did the sweet potato tell the pumpkin?
    • I yam what I yam.
  • Brown, hairy, and with sunglasses, what are you?
    • A coconut on vacation.
  • Can you guess what kind of vegetable is the most likely to like rock and roll?
    • An ear of corn!
  • What made the corn stalk mad at the farmer?
    • He kept pulling its ears! 
  • What did the little cob of corn call his father?
    • Pop Corn!
  • Do you know what happens if you cross fruit and bowling?
    • A banana split.
  • What kind of fruit grows on a calendar?
    • Dates.
  • In the fruit salad world, what is called a messy salad?
    • A “fig-sty”!
  • If a paramedic and a citrus fruit are paired together, what do you get?
    • Lemon-aid!
  • If an acrobat and a fruit crossed, what would you get?
    • An apple turnover!
  • Which fruit has formal weddings all the time?
    • The cantelope.
  • Have you heard about the fire at the dried fruits factory?
    • It was an apricotastrophe.
  • Why didn’t the fruit salad get sunburned?
    • It had plenty of melon in it.
  • When someone steals a fruit drink, what do you call them?
    • A smoothie criminal.
  • During World War II, which fruit was most commonly used?
    • The pineapple grenade.
  • The cantaloupe jumped into the pool for what reason?
    • It wanted to become a watermelon.
  • Is there any fruit that always feels depressed?
    • A blue-berry.
  • What made the plum put sugar under its pillow?
    • So it could have sweet dreams.
  • What do you do when you make an apple turnover?
    • Push it down the hill.
  • Green and square, what is it?
    • A lemon in disguise.

The Healthy Fruit Quiz

Author’s Note

By adding a fruit pun to the conversation, you can have a laugh, steal a kiss and say thanks in a unique way. The funny fruit puns above would make an excellent text message or lunchbox note to brighten anyone’s day. Try it out!

Trying to come up with more funny jokes to share? You don’t have to worry, we’ve got you covered! The following are a few of our funniest jokes. If you want more puns, be sure to check out Funny Jokes Today‘s entire collection.

Want to know what the best fruit carving ideas are? Take a look at these ideas!

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About the author

Megha Sharma

Megha is the heart of - When waking up in the morning, her first thought always is how to create a smile on someone's face before breakfast. Her passion are jokes for the youngest and about animals.

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