30+ Funny Helium Jokes: Laugh Your Way to a Good Time

Funny jokes are some of the best icebreakers in the world because laughter is contagious and it spreads like wildfire. It is the most effective way to get people to like each other and feel more comfortable.

This blog is a compilation of some of the hilarious helium jokes and the funny things to say on helium that will have you laughing your way to a good time.

Funny Things to Say on Helium

“I am the supreme Lord of Darkness! Bow before me, mortals!”

“Luke, I am your father”
A selection of Buzz Lightyear quotes:
- “To infinity and beyond!”
- “This is an intergalactic emergency.”
- “You are a sad, strange little man, and you have my pity.”
- “Because of YOU, the future of this entire universe is in jeopardy!”
“Buddy the elf, what’s your favorite color”

“Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee like to welcome you to Munchin Laaaaaand”
“Hey! Follow the sound of my voice and kill whoever is holding the phone!”
Ryan: “And now I will do a hoedown.”
“We’re the Chipmunks! C-H-I-P-M-U-N-K! We’re the Chipmunks!”

“Uhh, can you guys help me find my balls?”
“I can’t breathe.”
“I’m sorry, you have cancer/ aids/ no legs/ only three days to live”.
“But lieutenant dan you ain’t got no legs”.

“Holy crap! What the heck happened to my voice?!”
“Help! I just got cursed and my voice box is gonna explode due to tension!”
“We represent the lollipop guild, the lollipop guild, the lollipop guild. And on behalf of the lollipop guild, we welcome you to munchkin land!”
“Do you ever wanna go to space?” – “I really shouldn’t be doing this.” (Morgan Freeman on Jimmy Fallon)

“Oh Larry, be happy.”
“Hello Sidney, what’s your favorite scary movie?”
“I will build a wall and the Mexicans will pay for it.”
“You won’t like me when I’m angry.”

“Make America great again.”
“She’s running her mouth like a toilet seat.”
“I killed like so many plants”
“I’m a pretty pretty unicorn.”

“Don’t taze me, bro.”
“Good one, Chief”

Hilarious Helium Jokes

Have you heard the story of the guy who found a job right away after quitting the helium factory?
- Their references spoke very highly of them.
During a house fire, helium saved 6 people.
- He’s such a noble gas.
I’ve never inhaled helium before.
- But people speak very highly of it.
Today, I resigned from my job at the Helium factory.
- I refuse to be spoken to in that tone.

A friend was arrested for impersonating a helium balloon.
- After holding him for a while, the police released him.
I went to a fancy dress party dressed as helium.
- I was told it looked terrible by someone.
- I didn’t react.

I read a helium book.
- I just couldn’t put it down.
Decided to make bubble wrap filled with helium.
- As a result, everything will weigh less and I will save a lot on postage.

Looking for more funny jokes to brighten up your day? We’ve got you covered! These are some of our favorite jokes that you’ll definitely enjoy sharing with your friends and family. To see the complete joke list, click here.