The Funniest University Jokes Proving Higher Education Is Hilarious

You’ve heard that university students are smart, you’ve heard that they’re stressed, and that they work hard. But did you know that they are often quite funny too? When times get tough, being able to laugh at ourselves is an important quality to have. Have fun with the funniest university jokes and relax from the seriousness of university life.

Educating the next generation is a serious business. Throughout our lives, we’ve all spent years studying, trying to get good grades and hoping to find a good job. It is a big commitment. Let’s not forget about the countless hours of fun we’ve missed out on. University is a time of great joy and of great sorrow.

Humorous University Puns & Stories

  • Even if you haven’t been to university, you aren’t stupid. Albert Einstein was the first person to climb Mount Everest without going to university.
  • In university, my psych professor asked if we had heard of Pavlov. My reply was, “it rings a bell”. No one laughed, I’m too witty for this class.
  • Once upon a time a vampire graduated from university. His fellow monsters and family Con-dracula-ted him.
  • A university student placed an inter-library loan request for your Mom. Unfortunately, the file was too large to be delivered.
  • Liberty University’s Jerry Falwell Jr is leaving… he says he wants to spend more time with his family.
  • After collecting tuition, room, and board, my university just cancelled classes. The bookstore informed me that my textbook edition had already expired.
  • As a direct announcement from The University of Dad Comedy, all dads will be using inside jokes from now on.
  • Trump didn’t do too well with Trump University. He is also not looking good in the Electoral College.
  • An engineering student failed his final exams because he forgot the design of an electricity-producing barrier at dams. It seems he has lost his dam-mind.
  • Finally, my dream is coming true. Among the many people who applied for Harvard University, they selected me to be the janitor.
  • What a damn. I just found out after I got my Bachelor degree at the University of Barad-dûr. I went back and got my Masters there. I’m found to be a second-degree Mordor.
  • A mugger jumps out in front of a university student and yells “your money or your life!”. The student continues to walk, and says, “Sorry, I’m a Computer Science student. I don’t have either.”.
  • In the university, a man studies archeology during the day and dreams of finding a girlfriend at night. Despite his best efforts, he could never master the art of dating. In the end, his professors had to fail him.

Funny University Jokes

  • Why did the math book feel glum in university?
    • Because it couldn’t solve its own emotional problems along with math equations!
  • How do you make a tissue groove at a university party?
    • You inject it with a dose of “funk-ology”!
  • What’s a university student’s all-time favorite sandwich?
    • A “graduation cap”-rese, because it’s the only thing they can capably make!
  • How do you recognize a true university student?
    • They believe a balanced diet means a pizza in one hand and a pizza in the other!
  • Why did the computer decide to attend university?
    • To gain some “byte”-sized knowledge, of course!
  • In a university class taught by a cannibal, what would you call it?
    • A Hannibal Lecture.
  • At this time, what is the most expensive video-streaming service?
    • University.
  • The neurologist went to an African animal university for what reason?
    • He wanted to study the hippocampus.
  • Why doesn’t the sun attend university?
    • Because it has 5 thousand degrees.
  • What is the best way to sleep the night before an exam?
    • I sleep next to my notes, sincerely hoping they transfer into my brain by osmosis.
  • Student: I think I did not deserve a zero on my final exam. That seems unfair to me.
    • Professor: I completely agree with you. However, that is the lowest grade I can give you.
  • Student 1: Great news, we have an exam today, whether it rains or shines.
    • Student 2: So? So what’s so great about that?
    • Student: Look outside, it is snowing, score!
  • Father: Oh no, what happened to you? How is it that you got such a poor score on your exam?
    • Son: Simple absence.
    • Father: You were absent on exam day?
    • Son: I wasn’t, but the girl who sits next to me was.
  • Professor: Write an essay. Topic is “If I were a millionaire.”
    • Everybody starts writing except for John.
    • Professor: Why aren’t you writing, John?
    • John: It’s simple. I am waiting for my secretary.
  • Son: I’m unsure about my college studies, Dad.
    • The father laughed.
    • Father: “You are in a major problem then, dear son!’

The Ultimate University Trivia Quiz


University life is an experience that most people are looking to find some humour in. However, there are some real gems that are hidden within the realms of higher education – these are the funniest university jokes that will make you wonder why you didn’t join sooner! Hope you enjoyed reading.

Check out this fun collection of jokes, quotes, and songs. They’ll brighten your day. Some of them are listed below.

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