Family Puns to Make Your Loved Ones Laugh Until They’re Snotty

It’s amazing how much creativity and humor can come out of seemingly simple topics. Family puns are a great example of this.

They allow us to use some of the most commonplace words or phrases and make us break down in laughter because of the way they interact with our family members. 

This blog will look at the lighter side of family, looking at family in a different, funnier way. We will bring you the best family puns and other gems that are bound to raise a smile.

Crazy Family Jokes

  • When you’re about to test a new dad joke on your family, what do you say to warn them?
    • Try this on for sighs.
  • What does time and space have in common with family?
    • It’s all relative.
  • Which fruit is grandma’s favorite?
    • Elder-berry.
  • When E.T. got home, what did his mother tell him?
    • “Where on Earth have you been?!”
  • What made the kid cross the playground?
    • To get to the other slide.
  • What makes a computer so smart?
    • It listens to its motherboard.
  • Did you see the sweater my grandmother made for me?
    • It’s pretty knit.
  • Why did grandma leave her job at the glue factory?
    • She could not stick with it.
  • What was baby corn’s question to mommy corn?
    • Where’s my pop corn?
  • Mama kangaroos hate rainy days. Why?
    • Because their kids have to play inside.

We’ve got dad jokes, mom jokes, sister jokes and brother jokes. Have fun making them laugh with jokes that are relevant to them.

Funny Family Puns & Short Stories

  • Recently, I threw a gender reveal party. It didn’t turn out too well.
    • Everyone already knew I was a girl.
  • Son: Dad! Am I adopted? 
    • Dad: Of course not! 
    • Dad: What would make me choose you?
  • A woman told her preacher that she was preparing her will and that she had two final requests. 
    • First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes spread over Wal-Mart.
    • “Wal-Mart?” the preacher exclaimed. 
    • “Why Wal-Mart?” “Then I’ll be sure my daughters will visit me twice a week.”
  • Son: “Dad, could you tell me what a solar eclipse is?”
    • Dad: “No sun.”
  • “Do you know what the opposite of ladyfinger is?” my Dad asked at dinner yesterday.
    • We all nodded our heads in No.
    • Dad : “Mentos”
  • Are dads always snoring?
    • Nah. Only when they’re sleeping.
  • A kid decides to burn down his house.
    • With tears welling in their eyes, Dad put his arm around his wife, “That’s arson.” 
  • I suggested that my grandmother throw a party with a space theme.
    • She’s asked me to plan-et.
  • While singing karaoke in front of the whole family, my brother felt shy.
    • Grandma said, “Don’t be shy, just duet.”
  • Coffee has a difficult time in our household.
    • It gets mugged every single morning.
  • The kids are raisin such a grape bunch.
    • I do not carrot all about the lack of peas and quiet. 

Hilarious Family One-Liners

  • If there is a will,
    • there is a relative.
  • I smile because you’re family to me.
    • I laugh because there’s nothing you can do about it. 
  • I’m sorry I’m late,
    • I’ve got kids.
  • Heredity: everyone believes in it until their kids behave like fools!
  • Today at church, a guy in a suit attempted to drown me.
    • And I kid you not, my family just stood there taking pictures!
  • I was accused by my wife of hating her family and relatives.
    • As I replied, I don’t hate your relatives.
    • In fact, I like your mother-in-law a lot better than I like mine.
  • When I was a kid, I had a disease that required me to eat dirt three times a day in order to survive.
    • It’s a good thing my older brother told me about it.
  • I was going to cook a surprise dinner for my family,
    • but the fire trucks ruined it.
  • We use a really strong sunblock when we go to the beach with the kids. It’s SPF 80: You squeeze the tube, and a sweater comes out.
    • -Lew Schneider
  • It’s cool that you don’t have to add six numbers to a name to make sure it’s available for your child.
  • My looks are all inherited from my father.
    • Mostly just the look of disappointment. 
  • My mother asked me what I could get her for Mother’s Day.
    • She said she’d really like a doctor for her son-in-law.

A family’s love, care, and affection are a source of strength and happiness. Families do also have conflicts and fights, but they are still able to stay together. Keep loving and caring for one another. Don’t forget to make them laugh with these jokes!

We hope our family puns and jokes made you smile. You can share these puns and jokes while doing some of these Fun Family Activities to Do at Home.

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About the author

Megha Sharma

Megha is the heart of funnyjokestoday.com - When waking up in the morning, her first thought always is how to create a smile on someone's face before breakfast. Her passion are jokes for the youngest and about animals.

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