Funny Aunt Jokes That Will Make Them Love You More

Do you have a funny aunt back home? If you do, then you must have spent a lot of time with her. Try to remember all the jokes that she cracked during the time you spent together.

It’s okay if you can’t, even if you now have an aunt’s joke to share with her. You can use these aunt jokes to make her laugh.

Funny Aunt Jokes and Puns

  • What is the best way to introduce a loaf of bread to your angry aunt?
    • Meatloaf croissant.
  • Penguins have a favorite aunt. Who is it?
    • Aunt Arctica.
  • How do you assassinate your aunt with medicine?
    • Anti-Venom.
    • How do you stop her fawning over you if you want her alive?
    • Anti-Dote.
  • What gets rid of your uncles if ant poison gets rid of your aunts?
    • Anti-funcle cream.
  • Who visits you more often than your aunt?
    • Your acne.
  • Can you tell me what Bruce Jenner’s nephew’s favorite movie is?
    • Aunt Man.
  • Can you tell me how you pronounce “Aunt”?
    • “Ont”, “Ant”, or “Goldnt”?
  • When you get into a fight in Bel-Aire, what happens?
    • Aunt Viv sends you back to Philly.

Enjoy these mom jokes, dad jokes, brother jokes, and sister jokes as well. A great way to bond with your family!

Hilarious Aunt One Liners and Stories

  • The sister of my mom works in a bakery and is always in a foul mood.
    • She’s my cross aunt.
  • The way my aunt died was ironic since her star sign was cancer.
    • She was eaten by a giant crab.
  • There’s no way I can touch my aunt without exploding.
    • She’s made of auntie matter.
  • I have an aunt who has a traditional remedy for Tourette’s.
    • She swears by it.
  • I hope Will Smith’s mom didn’t watch the Oscars.
    • He might have to move back in with his auntie and uncle in Bel-Air.
  • My aunt is a Jew.
    • A holocaust denier as well.
    • We call her Auntie Semite.
  • For years, my aunt has been eating soil.
    • It really keeps her grounded.
  • My mom’s sister took methanol and now cannot move.
    • Later though, I found out it’s commonly used as auntie freeze.
  • A man in Alabama killed his wife, sister, mother, niece, daughter, and aunt.
    • How many people die?
  • I asked my aunt, “What is the cost of a couple?”
    • “2 or 3” she replied.
    • This probably explains why her marriage ended.
  • After visiting my mom’s house, my Aunt commented, “If you have anything that no one likes, or makes people upset, or is useless, throw it away.” 
    • The next time my Aunt visited she said “Where is your daughter?”
    • My Mom said “I followed your advice.”
  • An aunt of mine was a human cannonball.
    • I’m not sure if she was good at it until she got fired.
  • Auntie believes mucous membranes have rights.
    • She calls herself a Phlegminist.
  • There are two of my mom’s sisters who live in the wilderness of Alaska.
    • It’s a double aunt tundra.
  • I’d like to share with you how I became a millionaire.
    • First, I bought one apple for a dollar with my savings.
    • Then I went out on the street and sold it there for two dollars.
    • With the two dollars I bought two apples for 1$ each and again sold them for 2 dollars each.
    • Now I’ve had 4 dollars and was able to buy 4 apples, which, you may have guessed, I sold for 2 dollars each.
    • Now I have eight dollars, so I bought eight apples, and so on…
    • My aunt died a few days later, and I inherited her assets.
  • Little Johnny: Mommy, what does it mean to be transsexual?
    • Mom: I think you should ask Aunt Dave that question.
  • At weddings, my aunts poked me in the ribs and cackled, telling me, “You’re next.”
    • They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
  • In order to keep up with the fast pace of life, my aunt told me not to blink.
    • She now suffers from severe eye inflammation.
  • My aunt was a parsimonious person, but…
    • when she died and went towards the light it was just to shut it off.
  • There is a rumor that Aunt Jemima is changing her name.
    • Not so sure “Uncle Toms” is the best replacement.
  • Aunty Acid: Don’t you hate it when you put something away so you won’t lose it…
    • and then you forget where you put it. 
  • Aunty Acid: Don’t chase after a bus or a man, there will always be another one. 

Check out these perfect gifts for your aunt no matter what the occasion. It will be a big hit with them, I’m sure!

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