Silly Alabama Jokes That Will Leave You in Stitches

Don’t you just love it when your state is known for something unique? Alabama is known for some pretty great things. They have the world’s largest chicken fry, the oldest football stadium, and some of the sweetest honey around. 

Below are the funniest and most obscure Alabama jokes you’ll love and leave you in stictches.

Many of us know Alabama has some pretty funny jokers, and we love to poke fun at both the outsiders and fellow Alabamians. The state ranks at the top of many lists, and we like to play up our stereotypes.

Funny Alabama Jokes

  • How do you know you’re in Alabama?
    • Even the mosquitoes have drawls, and they hum country tunes while they nibble!
  • What’s an Alabamian’s favorite type of music?
    • Country and roll – because nothing pairs better with biscuits than a little rock ‘n’ roll!
  • Why don’t Alabamians ever play hide and seek in the forest?
    • Because good luck hiding when the trees keep saying, “Y’all come out now, ya hear?” And they’ve got the tree-megaphones!
  • How do you make an Alabamian laugh on a Monday?
    • Tell them it’s almost football season, and watch their excitement skyrocket faster than a touchdown pass!
  • What do you call an Alabamian with a Ph.D.?
    • A hill-billy scientist who can calculate the perfect moonshine fermentation ratio while strumming a banjo!
  • What is the best way to make Alabama cookies?
    • Put them in a big bowl and beat for three hours.
  • The average SAT score in Alabama is what?
    • Drool.
  • What did the Alabama graduate tell the Tennessee graduate?
    • Welcome to McDonald’s, may I take your order please?
  • Have you heard about the $5,000,000 Alabama State Lottery?
    • The winner gets $5 a year for a million years. 
  • OJ Simpson moved to Alabama for what reason?
    • Everyone has the same DNA. 
  • Recently, what new law was passed in Alabama?
    • Even when a couple gets divorced, they are still brothers and sisters! 
  • At Alabama, what do you call a genius?
    • Visitor.
  • Why does every tree in the world lean towards Alabama?
    • Because Alabama Sucks
  • Have you seen the new Welcome Signs in Alabama?
    • Now Leaving US of A. Welcome to Alabama!”
  • At Dairy Queen, what do you call 23 John Deere tractors?
    • Prom Night at Auburn.
  • OJ Simpson wants to move to Alabama for what reason?
    • Everyone there has the same DNA
  • In Alabama, DNA evidence is not allowed. Why is this?
    • Simply because it is all the same.
  • A virgin from Alabama is called what?
    • An orphan.
  • Have you heard that the governor’s mansion in Alabama has burned down?
    • They almost took out the whole trailer park.
  • What is the best thing that ever came out of Alabama?
    • I-20 and I-10.
  • When you drive slowly across Auburn’s campus, you get what?
    • A diploma.
  • How many Auburn freshmen are needed to screw in a lightbulb?
    • Zero, that’s a sophomore course.
  • What is the best way to get an Alabama football player off your porch?
    • Pay him for the pizza.
  • When you see an Auburn player dressed in a three-piece suit, what do you say?
    • “Will the defendant please rise?”
  • Is there anything in common between a maggot and an Alabama fan?
    • They can both live off a dead bear for years.
  • What do you get when you put 28 Alabama Sorority girls in the same room?
    • A full set of teeth.
  • From Louisiana to Alabama, how long does it take?
    • One Mississippi.
  • Do you remember that level in Mario where the sun tries to kill you?
    • That’s Alabama.    

Jokes to Make You Laugh Anytime and Anywhere: Iowa Jokes, Chicago Bears Jokes, Volleyball Jokes, Butt Jokes

Humorous Alabama One Liners and Silly Facts

  • When women get married in Alabama,
    • they don’t even change their last names.
  • There are 5 million people living in Alabama…
    • and 4 last names.
  • A new dating site has taken Alabama by storm…
    • It’s pretty rare in other places, so you may have heard of it. It’s called OnlyFams.
  • Alabama:
    • The state where and eHarmony are the same. 
  • Alabama Man:
    • We split up. But she said we could still be cousins. 
  • Most states: “It’s okay, it won’t be awkward. We’re still friends.”
    • Alabama: “She didn’t want to be my girlfriend anymore. But she said she’ll still be my sister.”
  • A state trooper pulls over a pickup truck on I-20 in Alabama. “
    • Got any ID?” he asks the driver.
    • “About what?” the driver replies.
  • CSI Alabama failed…
    • all the DNA is too similar and no dental records exist.
  • Alabama VS. Mississippi
    • A man lived in Alabama. Then he moved to Mississippi. He raised IQ levels in both states.
  • I don’t understand time zones!
    • In Europe, how is it possible that this is the case.
    • It is tomorrow in Australia. And in Alabama it is 1890?
  • Roy Moore will not concede the Alabama Senate race.
    • As long as the black votes are only counted for 3/5ths, he keeps insisting the black votes should not count.
  • The drinking age in Alabama has been raised to 34.
    • Their goal was to keep alcohol out of high schools.
  • After my crush told me that she liked me as a brother, I was feeling sad.
    • I realized then that she was from Alabama.
  • Fun Fact: Mom Jokes don’t work in Alabama.
    • Neither do sister jokes nor dad jokes. 
  • Just when you thought you were going to score a girl in Alabama.
    • However, you realize she is already engaged to her brother. 

The Alabama Adventure Quiz

Author’s Note

Hopefully, you will laugh hysterically at these silliest Alabama jokes or at the very least, be left in stitches. Alabama is home to some of the world’s funniest people. Feel free to share these jokes at your next family or friend bonding event.

Discover what Alabama is known for. The perfect game for your family trivia night.

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