Hilarious Office Jokes That Will Leave Everyone Laughing

There is no secret about office life being tough: You may have to deal with long hours, difficult coworkers, and bosses who refuse to stop talking about vacation. But these people matter, even if they don’t always seem like it. 

They make your days better than they would be otherwise! And sometimes all it takes is a good joke or two to remind yourself of this important fact.

We guarantee these office jokes will leave everyone at the office laughing and feeling good about themselves again!

Funny Office Jokes

  • My boss told me to start every presentation with a joke.
    • So, I introduced myself!
  • My office is like a family.
    • You know, dysfunctional and full of strange characters!
  • Many of my jokes are about unemployed people,
    • but none of them work.
  • Teamwork is essential; it eliminates blame from oneself.
  • I exercise my mind by;
    • jumping to conclusions, pushing myself to the limit, and dodging deadlines.
  • Debugging is the process of removing software bugs,
    • while programming is the process of introducing them.
  • It seems like everyone in the office is naming their food nowadays.
    • I noticed it today when I was eating a sandwich named Melissa.
  • I really love pressing F5.
    • It is so refreshing.
  • Unfortunately, my memory has become so bad that I lost my job.
    • I’m still working, although I’m not sure where.
  • It’s funny to be an astronaut.
    • You get fired before you even show up to work.
  • The best way to say “goodbye” 300 times is on a conference call with a dozen people.
  • When people start working,
    • they tend to stop looking for jobs.
  • As long as they pretend to pay me,
    • I will pretend to work.
  • It is possible for a person to attempt to attain perfection by filling out a job application form.
  • Father: What would you like to be when you grow up?
    • Son: A doctor.
    • Father: And what’s the reason behind that?
    • Son: Because it’s the only profession that involves telling women to strip off their clothes, and then passing the bill along to their husbands.
  • “Can you teach me yoga?” I asked the corporate wellness officer.
    • He asked me, “How flexible are you?”
    • I responded, “I can’t make Tuesdays.”
  • The client told the designer,
    • “It doesn’t look like purple. It’s more like a mix between red and blue.”
  • Doctor reaches into his smock to find a pen to write a prescription and pulls out a rectal thermometer.
    • “Oh, damnit,” he exclaims. “Some asshole has my pen!”
  • The reason we “nod off” is so that it looks like we are just nodding off on everything in a boring meeting.
  • A company is like a tree full of monkeys, each limb at a different level.
    • The monkeys at the top see a tree full of smiling faces while the monkeys at the bottom look up and see only assholes.
  • Going to work is okay for me,
    • but the eight-hour wait to get home is what upsets me.
  • Could you please tell me why the can crusher lost his job?
    • Because it was soda pressing.
  • Christmas is like your job, why?
    • The fat guy in the suit gets all the credit even though you do all the work.
  • Why don’t skeletons ever go to work?
    • Because they don’t have the guts!
  • Why was the math book at the office upset?
    • Because it had too many problems to solve before lunch!
  • Did you hear about the banker who lost all his pens?
    • Now he can’t draw his own conclusions!
  • How do you address a lawyer who is not familiar with the law?
    • A judge.
  • Do your boss and a slinky have anything in common?
    • Both of them are entertaining to watch tumble down the stairs.
  • What happens when you bury 100 lawyers up to their necks in sand?
    • There is not enough sand.
  • A lawyer skimmed the Bible shortly before he died, why?
    • His goal was to find loopholes!
  • Why do lawyers not attack sharks?
    • Professional courtesy.
  • What kind of parties do construction workers have?
    • They raise the roof.
  • How do you tell if an engineer is an extrovert?
    • While he talks to you, he stares at YOUR shoes.
  • Is there a difference between a waitress that works at a strip club and an actual stripper?
    • About two weeks.
  • What can a goose do that a duck cannot, but a lawyer must?
    • Shove its bill up its ass!
  • Why not bake pancakes for designated hitters?
    • They also fail to remember the batter.
  • Would you know what happens to a pilot if you piss him off?
    • He takes off.
  • Why do proctologists seem so gloomy?
    • They always have the end in sight.
  • What made the civil engineer’s marriage so unstable?
    • Because there was no truss left!

The Office Prankster Quiz

Bottomline

If you’re looking for a way to lighten the mood in the office, these hilarious office jokes will not disappoint! If you want a getaway from work or are just looking to laugh with your co-workers, these jokes will not let you down!

Come on, here are some more funny jokes that will make your stomach hurt from laughing again.

If you want more puns, visit our entire collection of Funny Jokes Today.

Check out 30 Fun, Creative, and Unique Employee Awards. Ideal for a Get Together and bringing some fun to the office.

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About the author

Megha Sharma

Megha is the heart of funnyjokestoday.com - When waking up in the morning, her first thought always is how to create a smile on someone's face before breakfast. Her passion are jokes for the youngest and about animals.

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