Funny Michael Jackson Jokes You’ll Never Forget

Michael Jackson was the King of Pop and many of his songs have gone on to become classics. Aside from the fact that he has a good sense of fashion, he is also known for his dancing and love for children. 

All of these have contributed to making him a legendary figure. However, he was also known to be a practical joker. In honor of this legend, here are the funny Michael Jackson jokes you won’t soon forget.

Silly Michael Jackson Jokes

  • Why did Michael Jackson embark on a shopping spree for new outfits?
    • Because he aspired to “moonwalk” into fashion’s spotlight with dazzling style!
  • Michael Jackson’s reaction when he misplaced his glove?
    • “You’ve got to hand it to me; losing this is a real thriller!”
  • Ever wonder why Michael Jackson carried a ladder to his concert?
    • He aimed to elevate his performance by hitting those celestial high notes!
  • Michael Jackson’s preferred beer choice?
    • “Hee-hee”-neken – the brew with a signature moonwalk of flavor!
  • Why did Michael Jackson consider a bakery gig?
    • Because he envisioned “pie”-oneering new, rhythmic ways to spread sweetness to the world!
  • Could you tell me where Michael Jackson left his other glove?
    • In Brooke Shields’ lap.
  • What method does Michael Jackson use to pick his nose?
    • From a catalogue.
  • What is the best way to neuter Michael Jackson?
    • Give him spiked gloves and tell him to sing a song.
  • Michael Jackson said what to Lorena Bobbit?
    • “SILLY Bobbit! Dicks are for KIDS!” 
  • Michael Jackson got food poisoning for what reason?
    • He ate a nine year old wiener! 
  • Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan have what in common?
    • They both play ball in the Minor League. 
  • Michael is trying out for the NBA for what reason?
    • He’s a crack shooter. 
  • Michael Jackson called Boys to Men for what reason?
    • Because he tought it was a delivery service! 
  • What’s the best way to tell when Michael Jackson has to go to bed?
    • When the big hand touches the little hand.
  • What are Walmart and Michael Jackson alike?
    • Both have small boys pants at half off! 
  • How is Michael Jackson different from a grocery bag?
    • They are both white, plastic, and dangerous for children. You put groceries in the other. 
  • Do Michael’s rear and the jail in Los Angeles have anything in common?
    • Both hold the juice. 
  • Why do Michael Jackson’s pants seem so small?
    • It’s because they’re not his! 
  • When Michael Jackson was at the beach, what did the lady say to him?
    • Get out of my sun (son).
  • Have you heard about Michael Jackson’s new book?
    • It’s called the in’s and outs of child Rearing 
  • Do Michael Jackson and x-boxes have anything in common?
    • They are both made of plastic and little boys turn them on. 
  • Have you heard about the new McDonald’s McJackson sandwich?
    • This is a 35-year-old steak between two 12-year-old buns.
  • Is there any difference between Michael Jackson and shit on the carpet?
    • They both smell and they both are black, but Michael isn’t fuzzy.
  • How did Michael actually proposition the little boy?
    • It was a simple slip of the tongue.
  • Does Michael Jackson have something in common with a snowman?
    • They both melt in the sun.
  • When Michael Jackson fell off the boat, what did he yell? “
    • Throw me the bouy!!!”
  • What should you do if Michael Jackson drowns?
    • Throw him a buoy!
  • What are the similarities between Michael Jackson and Rum?
    • They both come in small tots. 
  • Does Michael Jackson have anything in common with Malt Whiskey?
    • They both come in tots. 
  • When Michael leaves the dinner table, what does he hand around?
    • The under Eights. 
  • What caused Pepsi to fire Michael Jackson?
    • He was caught sucking on a Squirt!! 
  • Why did Michael Jackson not renew his contract with Pepsi?
    • Because he discovered that Bubbles were the main ingredients!
  • What are the similarities between Michael Jackson and broccoli?
    • The two are force fed to little boys.
  • What did Elvis say when he saw Michael and Lisa Marie on television?
    • “Boy, that’s a relief. I thought she married a black guy!” 
  • What did Michael Jackson tell Woody Allen?
    • “Got two fives for a ten?”

The Great Michael Jackson Personality Quiz


Michael Jackson is known for his moonwalk, for being the King of Pop and for his popular music. Did you also know he was a bit of a comedian? We knew he had a great sense of humour, and we loved him for his comedy skills. It’s our hope that you’ll enjoy the jokes we’ve shared as much as we do. 

Finally, here are some of the funniest jokes we recommend for your next reading pleasure.

Check out the top songs of Michael Jackson that touched many people’s lives.

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