Funny Reddit Jokes You’ll Never Stop Laughing

Who doesn’t love a good joke? If you’re into humor, there’s bound to be something on Reddit that will make you laugh. From clean jokes to dirty jokes, we’ve got them all! And we’ve gathered the best of the best, so you can be sure you’re getting the funniest jokes around. 

Read on for a good laugh!

Hilarious Reddit Jokes and Puns

  • Is there a reason why the bicycle fell over?
    • Because it was two-tired.
  • What was the reason for the cookie’s visit to the doctor?
    • Because it felt crummy.
  • What caused the coffee shop to file a police report?
    • It got mugged.
  • Can you tell me why there are no seagulls flying around the bay?
    • Because then they’d be bagels.
  • What caused the hipster’s tongue to burn?
    • He drank his coffee before it was cool.
  • If you cross the Atlantic with the Titanic, what do you get?
    • About halfway.
  • Can you tell me what the Canadians’ favorite board game is?
    • Sorry.
  • Can you tell me what kind of car a sushi chef drives?
    • Rolls Rice.
  • If the US switched from lbs to kg overnight, what would happen?
    • Mass confusion [fun fact, the US did legally change over a while back (I think 1960-80s but I didn’t fact check it bc I’m lazy) but no one cared or listened]
  • What makes a door not a door?
    • When it’s a jar.
  • Is there anything in common between Dr Frankenstein, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and a pregnant woman?
    • They’re all body builders.
  • Waldo wears stripes for what reason?
    • Because he doesn’t want to be spotted.
  • If you see a space man, what should you do?
    • Park in it man.
  • Can you tell me what the difference is between an inlaw and an outlaw?
    • Outlaws are wanted.
  • Reindeer serve what purpose?
    • To make the grass grow sweetie.
  • Why wouldn’t you hire a midget as a chef?
    • The steaks are too high.
  • Is there a reason why you never see hippos hiding in trees?
    • Because they’re very good at it.
  • Can you tell me what a gay horse eats?
    • Haaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!
  • How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irish person?
    • Zero.
  • To screw in a lightbulb, how many Alzheimer’s patients are needed?
    • To get to the other side!
  • Do you remember the story about the dog and the tree?
    • They had a long conversation about bark.
  • Anakin is short for Anakin, Obi is short for Obi-Wan, so what is Luke short for?
    • A stormtrooper.
  • How come you can’t hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?
    • Because the p is silent.
  • To change a light bulb, how many software engineers are needed?
    • That’s a hardware problem.
  • What is the secret to turning a duck into a soul singer?
    • Microwave it until it’s Bill Withers.

Funny Reddit One-Liners and Stories

  • My mind was wondering why the ball was getting bigger, then it hit me.
  • As a Buddhist approached a hotdog stand, he said…
    • “Make me one with everything.
  • To the person who stole my Microsoft Office, I will track you down.
    • You have my word.
  • My wife says she’ll hit me if I continue to make puns about Russia.
    • If that’s the way it’s going to be, then Soviet.
  • A soldier survived mustard gas in battle and pepper spray from the police.
    • He’s now a seasoned veteran.
  • You should notify the authorities right away if you see a monk selling flowers from door to door in your neighborhood.
    • Because only YOU can prevent florist friars.
  • The communist jokes are not funny.
    • Unless everyone gets them.
  • Two goldfish are swimming in a tank;
    • One turns to the other and says, You man the guns and I’ll drive.”
  • Make sure you don’t challenge Death to a pillow fight.
    • Unless you’re prepared for the reaper cushions.
  • I think I need a new doctor.
    • I can’t even get my star sign right on mine.
    • I’m a sagittarius, but he said I have cancer.
  • Policing exam.
    • The best way to interrogate a suspect.
    • Question one.
  • Tonight, my waitress only had one leg.
    • We were at IHOP.
    • Her name was Eileen.
    • I tipped her and she fell over.
  • At first, I didn’t think my chiropractor was any good.
    • But now I stand corrected.
  • There are two cowboys lost in the desert.
    • In the middle of the night, one cowboy sees a tree draped in bacon.
    • “A bacon tree! We’re saved!” He runs to the tree and is shot up with bullets.
    • It wasn’t a bacon tree.
    • It was a ham bush.
  • Say what you want about deaf people.
  • I know a lot of jokes about unemployed people but none of them work.
  • Kleptomaniacs take everything literally, so it’s hard to explain puns to them.
  • People tell me I’m condescending.
    • In other words, I talk down to people.
  • Murphy’s law is well known, right?
    • It says that anything that can go wrong will go wrong.
  • But have you heard of Cole’s law?
    • It’s thinly sliced cabbage.
  • Dubai citizens do not have access to The Flintstones, but Abu Dhabi residents do.
  • Today, my wife completed a 40-week bodybuilding program.
    • It’s a girl and weighs 7lbs 12 oz.
  • Today, my son asked “Can I have a bookmark?” and I burst into tears.
    • At 11, he still doesn’t know my name is Brian.
  • One atom says to another, “Somebody stole my electron!”
    • Second atom asks, “Are you sure?”
    • First replies, “Yes! I’m positive!”
  • After hearing that my neighbor had a bad day, I anonymously sent her a meat lover’s pizza.
    • She’s a vegan and I hate her guts. 
  • Julius Caesar walks into a bar and says, “I’ll have a Martinus.”
    • He looks puzzled at the bartender and asks, “Don’t you mean a Martini?”
    • “Look,” Caesar replies, “If I wanted a double, I’d have asked for it!” 
  • You can call me a racist, but south of the border is a sea of violence, corruption, and stupidity I won’t touch.
    • I just thank my lucky stars I live in Canada.
  • The Europeans can storm the Vatican if America storms Area 51.
    • We’ll take the aliens, you get the predators.

Author’s Note

When it comes to Funny Reddit Jokes, one thing is for sure: they’re the virtual treasure trove of humor! It’s a place where puns are king, wit reigns supreme, and laughter flows like upvotes. Remember, in the realm of Reddit humor, the only limit is the character count!

I hope we made you laugh as we did! Take a look at some of our favorite dad jokes, monkey jokes, and morning jokes to keep the fun going.

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