Funny Fence Puns and Jokes That Will Never Leave You Unguarded

Historically, fences have been used. Their functionality and ease of use make them a very popular choice for home improvement. 

A fence is a simple way to increase the value of your home, as well as add aesthetic value.

You will find funny fence puns and jokes in this blog that will stay with you for a long time.

Funny Fence Jokes

  • What’s a fence’s favorite type of math?
    • Geometry – it’s all about angles and corners! They can calculate the “angle of defense” with precision!
  • What did the fence say to the tree?
    • “You’re a great support – you’ve always got my back! And you’re knot too bad yourself!”
  • How do fences stay up to date on the latest news?
    • They read the “picket” news! It’s where they get all the “post-worthy” updates!
  • What’s a fence’s favorite game to play with the wind?
    • Hide and “sneak”! They’re masters at staying hidden from those gusty pranks.
  • Why did the picket fence make a good detective?
    • Because it had a sharp eye for detail! It could spot a loose nail from a mile away!
  • How did the fence become a successful musician?
    • It mastered the art of “fence-trumental” music! From the “string” theory to the “woodwind” notes, it could play them all!
  • Why do graveyards have fences around them?
    • Because people are dying to get it!
  • Did you hear about the cow that jumped over the barb wire fence?
    • It was udder destruction
  • The cow went around the fence for what reason?
    • To get to the udder side.
  • What is the purpose of cemeteries having fences around them?
    • People are dying to get in.
  • Why did the cow touch the electric fence?
    • Because it wanted to get electrocowted.
  • In Wales, what do you call four sheep tied to a fence?
    • A Brothel.
  • What is the best way to steal from a fence?
    • You picket’s pockets.
  • How do you refer to a Hungarian foil fencer?
    • A French wannabe.
  • What does the smartest sabre fencer have in common with a bottle of beer?
    • They’re both empty from the neck up.
  • What is the French foil fencer’s favorite whine?
    • “I can’t beat Italians.”
  • Did you know now that it is politically incorrect to say ‘black paint’?
    • Now you have to say “Jerome can you please paint the fence”.
  • When it’s time for an elephant to sit on your fence, what time is it?
    • Time to get a new fence.
  • Why are Mexicans never indecisive?
    • Because if they’re on the fence too long they get caught.
  • Have you heard about the hole in the fence at the nudist colony?
    • The police are looking into it. 
  • What caused the fight between the two gate-builders?
    • Because they were fencing.

Share these crazy neighbor jokes with your neighbor. You’ll both LOL for sure. You can also share house jokes that everyone can relate to, or nature jokes that will relax both of you.

Hilarious Fence Puns

  • A local farmer added a step to his fence to allow access to his field.
    • I like his stile.
  • The farmer has a sign that says “Do Not Touch His Fence.”
    • Not sure why, just can’t put my finger on it.
  • My friend is like lightning when hammering nails into his fence.
    • He never strikes the same place twice.
  • I just moved next door to a man who sells stolen goods on the black market.
    • You know what they say; “Good fences make good neighbours”
  • A bull was caught in an electric fence.
    • Think it was charging.
  • I’m on the fence about the COVID-19 vaccine, but the free stuff you can get for showing your vaccination card looks really nice.
    • I guess it’s worth a shot.
  • A hole was discovered in the fence surrounding the nudist camp.
    • Authorities are looking into it.
  • Instead of being on one side or the other of the fence,
    • why don’t we take it down? 
  • Fencing is like dancing…
    • except that you’re trying to kill your partner. 
  • Chuck Norris once knocked down a fence.
    • Maybe you heard of it, the Berlin wall.
  • The fencer thought he knew what was going to happen,
    • but his opponent feinted.
  • A couple of pigeons were sitting on my fence earlier,
    • so I yelled at them, and they both fell off.
    • I didn’t know you could kill two birds with one’s tone.
  • A mathematician is asked to build a fence around a flock of sheep using as few materials as possible.
    • So he builds a fence around himself and then defines himself as outside.
  • Perhaps the grass is greener on the other side of the fence.
    • However, it still needs to be mowed.
  • Our attractive next door neighbor is sunbathing nude in our backyard and my wife is furious.
    • Personally, I’m on the fence. 

The Fence Design Quiz

Author’s Note

In the world of humor, fences prove that even the most stationary objects can bring joy through clever wordplay and puns. They remind us that laughter can sprout from the most unexpected places, just like vines on a garden fence.

We hope you enjoyed our article jokes about fences. With this knowledge, we know that you can make the most of your garden by making sure you keep any horses or other animals away from it!

So what are you waiting for? Get out there and start sharing these jokes about fences.

If you love fence or planning to build one, read this article: 10 Tips to Build a Fence Even the Neighbors Will Love

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About the author

Megha Sharma

Megha is the heart of - When waking up in the morning, her first thought always is how to create a smile on someone's face before breakfast. Her passion are jokes for the youngest and about animals.

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